Before Having Kids…
Screaming, crying, sweet kisses, sleepless nights, happiness, the ultimate love. No, I’m not talking about the latest Oscar nominated drama. I’m talking about raising kids. The idea of having little rugrats is one thing, but the reality is another. Having a child is a huge responsibility that also comes along with the most amazing moments life has to offer.
There are some crucial things to consider before you make the leap to becoming a parent.
Kids are Expensive
Word on the street is that kids are costly. You need to consider whether or not you are financially secure enough to provide for a child. When deciding to have a baby, most people think about the basic necessities — formula, diapers, and clothes. But, remember to think about what comes next. You’ve got daycare, after-school activities, sports, piano lessons, high school, college, and everything in between. That’s a lot of dough to come up with, so start saving.
Your Partner’s Plans
If you have a partner, it’s important to be aware if you two are on the same page in terms of how you want your child to be raised. Talking about this is always a wise decision. Openly discussing topics such as discipline, religion, and other areas couples frequently disagree on is crucial. If you two aren’t on the same page, your book might sound more like a Stephen King novel.
When you have a child, you’re going to need help from your friends and family. The support you get from them will be extremely beneficial. You are going to need someone to call when you don’t know how to get that spit-up stain out of your favorite blouse. Or when you just need an hour off to do you, calling your best friend to come over might be all you need. Knowing if you have a support system you can count on is essential.
Your Emotional Readiness
Besides being financially ready, you have to be aware if you’re emotionally ready as well. I’m not talking about age — in this case, it’s just a number. It’s all about being emotionally mature, and not being a kid yourself. Are you ready to take on the challenges of being a parent? It’s a meaningful question to ask yourself.
Having a Child Won’t “Fix” Something
Sometimes people hope having a child will solve their current problems. Maybe a couple is having issues and they think if they have a baby, it would make their marriage stronger. Or, a woman believes having a baby will give her the feeling of love she cannot find for herself. It’s a complicated idea, but sometimes, people are feeling so low, they are grasping at anything to help.
However, a baby isn’t one of them. Having a child will probably only exacerbate the issues at hand. Truly think about the reasons behind your desire to have a child.
You’ll never have the same amount of privacy again. Good luck trying to take a nice 30-minute shower all by yourself after having a cute little baby. Say goodbye to shaving those legs. Not only is your personal privacy out the window, but your couples private time may take a holiday as well.
You Can’t Be Selfish
You’re not the No. 1 person in your life anymore, after having a baby. Selfishness has left the building. You’re going to have to be okay with not being the leading lady anymore. Most people thrive at this and love putting their children first. However, it’s a big transition to go from all about you to wiping up poo.
Raising a child is unlike any other experience. It will be a journey that is unforgettable and can be your most rewarding role. And if I’m really being honest, you can never be fully prepared. But taking the time to make a thoughtful, considered decision, with eyes wide open, may help you on all those nights when a little shuteye sounds like heaven.