“Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me.” Um, whoever said this clearly never had a bad word said to them before. Words can be harsh. They are hurtful at times, and at other times, simply annoying.
Some phrases or comments become a habit, and you don’t notice how these things irk other people, even when the words are directed at you. Think before you speak to avoid sending an accidental insult or letting someone misjudge you based on your words.
Here are 10 things that we should probably stop saying to each other, if we know what’s good for us.
“RELAX” OR “CALM DOWN”
Nobody, and I mean, nobody, wants to hear this statement. If you’re really worked up, the last thing you need to hear from somebody is “calm down.” This is only going to make you more upset, and in turn, not “relaxed.” So instead of telling a person these two phrases, how about you actually talk to people about what’s going on with them?
“YOU LOOK TIRED,” OR “ARE YOU SICK?”
These comments are nicer ways of saying, “You look like sh*t.” So no, I’m not tired or sick. Yes, this is just how I look. And now, I would like to stop talking to you.
Never, and I repeat, never respond with “K.” in a text message if you aren’t mad. It confuses the other person and now you’ve probably just sent him or her into a frenzy of “What did I do?” thoughts. Only use this if you’re trying to portray extreme anger towards another person. Then “K” with a period after it is the perfect text.
Welcome to the most passive-aggressive comment known to man. Only say, “I’m fine” if you are actually fine. When people ask you, “Are you okay?” they really do want to know the truth. Hiding your true feelings and saying you’re fine when you’re really not isn’t going to solve anything. Speak up and say how you truly feel.
“YOU LOOK SKINNY.”
We need to stop saying this to each other. Most people mean well when they say this to one another. However, it assumes that looking skinny is the end all, be all. If someone is consciously trying to lead a healthier lifestyle, a simple “You look great” will suffice. “Skinny” comments make the person receiving this message wonder how they looked before. It also makes some people feel uncomfortable and that their body is on display for others’ to comment freely on.
“NO OFFENSE, BUT…”
If you have to start off a sentence with “No offense, but,” you shouldn’t say it! You are going to offend that person and he or she probably doesn’t need to hear your opinion. Some things are better left unsaid.
“OH, YOU’LL LEARN.”
This statement is condescending and should be taken away from everybody’s vocabulary. Maybe after you say this and receive enough eye rolls, “you’ll learn” to never say this again.
“WHEN ARE YOU GOING TO GET MARRIED AND HAVE KIDS.”
First thing that is wrong with this question is that it assumes the other person wants either of these in his or her life. Second, it makes the person feel as if there is a clock ticking on these life moments. Save these questions for never.
“YOU’RE GOING TO EAT ALL OF THAT?”
Um, yes I am and now you’ve made me feel incredibly uncomfortable. Please go away.
“YOU DON’T NEED TO WEAR SO MUCH MAKEUP.”
While the sentiment is nice, please don’t comment on the amount of makeup a person is wearing. This job is for Moms only. Maybe that person likes a lot of blush. Or who’s to say dark lipstick is not a daytime look? Too much bronzer never hurt anybody.